What does the Bible say about love and relationships? Love is a principle. It is a gift from God that is demonstrated consistently by choice.
The Bible actually outlines a hierarchy of relationships: marriage, family friends with Jesus being the foundation. There are many more principles in the Word of God to cultivate love in relationships.
Meditate on these principles outlined below for inspiration and transformation.
1. IMPORTANT: the revised hierarchy of important relationships after marriage is as follows- spouse, children, parents of married couples, siblings, friends etc. please make decisions accordingly.
“Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.” Genesis 2:24()
2. The bond of marriage (two) with God as the foundation (threefold) can withstand the bitterest attack of the enemy.
“And if one prevail against him, two shall withstand him; and a threefold cord is not quickly broken.” (Ecclesiastes 4:12)
3. Marriage is a ministry. When you say “I do” you commit to lifting up your spouse for the duration of your lives. (And lifting up does not mean correcting, fixing or changing).
“For if they fall, the one will lift up his fellow: but woe to him that is alone when he falleth; for he hath not another to help him up.” (Ecclesiastes 4:10)
4. Just because it’s true doesn’t mean it needs to be said. Let your words be full of grace and kindness.
“Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers.” (Ephesians 4:29)
5. Ask yourself today, (husbands) how can I show care and pour love into my wife today? (wives) how can I speak words of life and respect to my husband today?
“Wherefore comfort yourselves together, and edify one another, even as also ye do.” (1 Thessalonians 5:11)
6. Wives, show respect due to the position that the man you married accepted when he became your husband. Husbands, Act on the principle of love daily as exemplified by Christ (unconditional) and not on your reactions to your wife’s attitude.
“Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them.” Colossians 3:18 – 3:19()
7. There is no room for retribution, tit-for-tat, passive-aggressiveness or unforgiveness in a relationship if you are a Christian. It’s just too much -and really- There is only so much room in a relationship.
“Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves, but rather give place unto wrath: for it is written, Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord.” (Romans 12:19)
8. Make a list of what you really want from your spouse-wait for it…and then you execute every point on that list towards him/her over the next 3 weeks.
“Therefore all things whatsoever ye would that men should do to you, do ye even so to them: for this is the law and the prophets.” (Matthew 7:12)
9. Marriage is an excellent training ground for heavenly aspirations. Ask God to help you see your spouse through heaven’s eyes and treat him/her with heavenly regard, dignity and Godly favor.
“A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another.” (John 13:34)
10. In marriage, you have someone to reflect back to you what God is really working with, the real you. And when you have a sense of your true need of a savior God can finally save you.
“Two are better than one; because they have a good reward for their labour.” (Ecclesiastes 4:9)
11. Let’s engage in the practice of silence and a short prayer before answering with a quick tongue and an angry heart: this.will.change.your.life.
“Wherefore, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath: For the wrath of man worketh not the righteousness of God.” (James 1:19 – 1:20)
12. Love is from God. If you don’t have it- ask God! If you could use more love -ask God! If you don’t know what it is-ask God! Ask of God.
“And the Lord make you to increase and abound in love one toward another, and toward all men, even as we do toward you” (1 Thessalonians 3:12)
13. Be your best to those closest to you. Smile more, sigh less. Give a pat on the back and not a roll of the eyes. Say, “that’s ok, I’ve got it” and don’t wonder if you “have to do everything around here?” do this, and family will be your friends, friends will be like family and heavenly angels will be your company.
“A man that hath friends must shew himself friendly: and there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother.” (Proverbs 18:24)
14. Nobody is born into a yoke. It is an attachment intentionally made to fulfill a purpose. With this in mind, do not choose to engage in a mutual relationship of any type with someone who does not love and respect God because they will eventually hate and/or disrespect you.
“Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?” (2 Corinthians 6:14)
15. These are the steps to developing a character of love and godliness in a relationship: step (1). faith, step (2). virtue, step (3). knowledge, step (4). temperance, step (5). patience. Do things (be kind) and think thoughts (be forgiving) that will cultivate these qualities in you. And when you are under a mountain of pressure, in the end, you will shine forth like a diamond.
“And beside this, giving all diligence, add to your faith virtue; and to virtue knowledge; And to knowledge temperance; and to temperance patience; and to patience godliness; And to godliness brotherly kindness; and to brotherly kindness charity.” (2 Peter 1:5)